Dearest members of the La Salle community, unfortunately, my time as a falcon has come to an end.

While it is tough to say goodbye to this place that I have grown so familiar with and comfortable in over the last four (ish) years, I know that the road ahead of me is filled with great new adventures.

However, that does not make saying my last goodbyes any less challenging — to my friends, to my teachers, to these halls, to sunny days in the courtyard, to pizza Fridays in the cafeteria, to spirit weeks, to school dances, and to publishing nights for The Falconer. 

All of these things are staying behind as I grow out of them, and it is hard to wrap my head around letting it all go.

One of my outlets for growing through big life events is music. So I’ve compiled a playlist of some of the songs that are currently helping me through this time of transition and watching my childhood slip away from me. 

It connects to my experiences and puts both words and sounds to the foreign feelings that I’m facing. Good music in tough times is a hug when you’re lonely, and a shoulder to cry on when you’re sad.

And I know that we could all use that sometimes.

Please enjoy.

“Changes” – Langhorne Slim, The Law

This song sets the tone for the playlist. It is a perfect folky articulation of having a reality check that life is passing by right in front of you. It is a deep breath before you cross the finish line. It is a song of conscious, bittersweet awareness.

My favorite line:

“Things could be stranger, but I don’t know how/ I’m going through changes now/ I’ve spent a lifetime trying to figure it out/ I’m going through changes now”

“Vienna” – Billy Joel

You can never go wrong with “Vienna” — this song is perfect in my eyes. It’s not sad, but hopeful. In the last few months, this song has really helped me gain clarity in the present moment and make decisions for the future. It is a beautiful reminder to be where you are, when you’re there; that it’s okay to not know what you want.

My favorite line:

“Slow down your doing fine/You can’t be everything you want to be before your time”

“Where’d All the Time Go?” – Dr. Dog

Oh boy. This song. It has really been a tear-jerker for me recently. It sounds like a last goodbye to someone who you deeply love, perhaps a best friend, or significant other. It’s a slow, inevitable goodbye, which comes so slowly but is gone too fast.

My favorite lines:

“Where’d all the time go?/ It’s starting to fly/ See how the hands go/ waving goodbye/ And you know I get so forgetful/ When I look in your eyes……And there ain’t no way to sweep up/the mess that we’ve made”

“All of This Will End” – Indigo De Souza

Indigo De Souza is a master at conveying the feeling of being lost, yet finding comfort and ‘home’ — her music parallels the angst, uncertainty, and beauty of coming of age. This song is the title track for De Souza’s latest album release back in April.

Talk about perfect timing — this song (and the whole album) has been a hand to hold as I’ve processed the upcoming transition out of high school. This song is comforting in the same way as ‘memento mori,’ which means ‘remember we must die.’ It has helped me realize that everything will be okay, even when you’re exhausted and lost.

My favorite line:

“I don’t have answers — no one does/ I’ve been finding comfort in that/ There’s only love/ There’s only moving through and trying your best/ Sometimes it’s not enough/ Who gives a f***/ All of this will end”

“It’s Called: Freefall” – Rainbow Kitten Surprise

This song is the feeling of confronting the unknown. It touches on the angst of being overwhelmed by it, and the euphoria of letting go, surrendering to what’s to come.

My Favorite line: 

“Anyway, you say you’re too busy/ saving everybody else to save yourself/ and you don’t want no help/ oh well, that’s the story to tell/ Like you could let it all go, you could let it all go/ It’s called: freefall”

“Never Grow Up” – Taylor Swift

A classic. A tearjerker. A narrative of what has happened and what’s to come. If you’re like me and grew up on Taylor Swift’s music, this song will hit home. It reminds me of the nostalgic feeling of nursery rhymes and the heart-aching feeling of having to leave everything you know behind.

My favorite line:

“Take pictures in your mind of your childhood room/ Memorize what it sounded like when your dad gets home/ remember the footsteps, remember the words said/ and all of your brothers’ favorite songs/ I realized everything I have is someday gonna be gone”

“Landslide” – Fleetwood Mac

This classic song is the quintessential narrative of heart-aching change. Unlike us, this song will never get old. It has withstood the test of time, as its narrative speaks to the natural pattern of change that occurs in our lives. It voices the questions that arise in uncertainty and soothes that worry with reassurance.

My favorite lines:

“Oh, mirror in the sky/ What is love?/ Can the child within my heart rise above?/ Can I sail through the changin’ ocean tides?/ Can I handle the seasons of my life?/ …But time makes you bolder/ Even children get older/ And I’m getting older too/ Oh! I’m getting older too”

“Kids” – Current Joys

Much like the title suggests, this song is a testament to the ‘kid’ experience. Its simple lyrics and rhythmic melody embody the feeling of getting older, facing the world, and feeling unprepared for what’s to come. It begs no forgiveness for being young and encourages youth to be something you hold on to. And that reminder is heart-aching.

My favorite line:

“Oh, I am just a kid/ I’m afraid of the dark/ But I’m obsessed with ideas/ One day I’ll go far”

“Do No Wait” – Wallows

This song is the sorrow of having to say goodbye to the people you love. It is having hope for the future of your friends or family, even if that means you’re not directly a part of it. It feels like trying to hold onto life as it passes by. Its chorus is like a promise to the people we have to leave behind as we move on, that we’ll still be there down the road, despite whatever happens. 

My favorite lines:

“And it gets worse before it gets better/ That’s one thing that I have come to know”

“All the things you don’t wanna let go/You wanna look back on in the cold/ All the times that feel like everything/When nothing really happens at all”

“Sleep On The Floor” – The Lumineers

Easily one of my favorite songs ever. This song is the search and longing for independence. It describes the challenges that one will inevitably face while trying to make a life for themselves — and the importance of these struggles as means for change. “Sleep on the Floor” fills my heart with trepidation and euphoria all at once. It has taught me that with making change, there is an inevitable risk, yet such fulfilling rewards are at stake

My favorite lines:

“‘Cause if we don’t leave this town/ We might never make it out/ I was not born to drown/ Baby come on”

“If the sun don’t shine on me today/ And if the subways flood and bridges break/ Will you lay yourself down and dig your grave/ or will you rail against your dying day?”

“Rivers and Roads” – The Head and the Heart

If this song doesn’t make a senior in high school cry, I don’t know what will. Whenever I hear this song, I can see the entirety of all my friendships flash before my eyes. I’ve heard the swelling chorus of this song subconsciously playing in the back of my head during the happiest moments of my senior year, and I can imagine that the slower, sadder parts will be playing as I’m saying my last goodbyes. This song should come with a warning.

My favorite line:

“A year from now, we’ll all be gone/ All our friends will move away/ And they’re goin’ to better places/ But our friends will be gone away”

“Burn, Burn, Burn” – Zach Bryan

Feeling overwhelmed, longing for simplicity — that’s what this song reminds me of. Feeling pressure to know everything, to have a plan when all you want to do is enjoy the simple things in life. I’ve really loved this song this year because of this message. This song is such a beautiful articulation of the unadulterated aspects of life that are often hard to find time to enjoy. It has served as a reminder to take a deep breath and to just be where I am — especially when I’m with my friends, thinking about how our paths are about to part ways.

 My favorite line:

“I know I’m bound to die one day/ So when I reach those golden gates/ I pray to say I did the best I can/ Sit with my mother and the dearly departed/ Send a prayer down to the broken-hearted/ Let ‘em know it all turns out just fine”

“Honey, It’s Alright” – Gregory Alan Isakov

I’ve included this song because it tells us what we need to know, yet is so easy to forget. The title explains it all. This song makes me sad because its message is really juxtaposing the ongoing feeling I have that everything is in fact not alright. I refuse to believe that it is because having to say goodbye to my best friends and the place I’ve grown to love is really hurting.

My favorite lines:

“Despite all out shuffling/ Our train wreck a-talking/ Despite all our outfield saves/…It’s alright/ Honey, it’s alright/ It’s alright to be alone”

“Change” – Big Thief

I’ve saved the best (and saddest) for last. It alludes to the natural nature of change as part of life, while tearing your heart out noting that your life will forever be changing, and all you have and know is not forever. I think I’ll let the song do the rest of the talking. This song makes me want to hug my friends tight and never let go.

My favorite line:

“Would you live forever, never die/ while everything around passes?/ Would you smile forever, never cry/ While everything you know passes?”

With nearly both feet out the doors of La Salle, I am really going through it in regard to my emotional state. Being confronted with all my lasts is an unsettling reality check that the end is here. It has snuck up on me, leaving me feeling overwhelmed and unprepared for what’s to come in the coming weeks and months.

But despite these foreboding feelings, this collection of songs brings me home. 

Each song is powerful on its own, but together I think this playlist encapsulates the feelings of going through change and witnessing time pass. 

I hope that you listen to this playlist and are reminded of the beauty in change — however heart-wrenching it may be —  and reminisce on cherished memories. 

Hold onto the daily things in life that bring you joy.

It will be gone before you know it.